These tips are for singles who take sexual purity seriously and want to commit to God, themselves and their future spouse.
Be sure you and your boyfriend are on the same page
when it comes to being sexually pure. We don’t believe only the girl in a
relationship should be concerned about being sexually pure, both the
guy and girl are to be held to the same standards, God's standards. What
does sexual purity and sexual sin mean to both of you. Read verses in
the bible that talk about sexual immorality and discuss them. Make sure
you do this early in the relationship before your emotions start raging
high (at this point it will be hard to make any reasonable decisions).
If you realise you are both on different pages, then it might be worth
reevaluating the purpose of that relationship. Our advice is that you
going into a relationship with a fellow christian who is on the same page as you. This will make it easier to overcome sexual sin.
Write out your standards and ask God to help you stick to them. You can make your own purity pledge cards or check google and print one and keep on you. Some singles choose to wear a purity ring
or purity necklace or bracelet till they get married. Both of you
should be committed to sticking to your pledge however don’t rely on
your boyfriend to enforce the standards. If your boyfriend is weak, you
have to step up, be strong and nip things in the bud.
Tell yourself it can happen to you. I think one big
problem that dating Christians have is they think it cannot happen to
them i.e. falling into sexual sin. As a result, temptation creeps up on
them and they are ill prepared. By acknowledging that you are human and
you have feelings and that YOU can fall into sexual sin, you can be more
prepared and guard yourselves against sin.
Be accountable to others about your relationship.
Find a mentor, this could be an older Christian married couple or
another Christian dating couple you trust and who takes sexual purity
seriously and be accountable to them. When you know you have to report
back on your dating affairs to someone that should help keep you in
check.
Focus on talking and not on touching. Communication
is very essential to the success of a relationship. Talk about anything
and everything. The more you talk the more you know about the other
person and the more you touch, the less you talk and the less you know
about the other person.
Plan your time together well in advance on activities
to do together. Avoid staying indoors for long or in places where you
cannot be interrupted. This can be a very conducive atmosphere to fall
into temptation. Go out more often, spend time with other dating
couples, spend time with family and spend more time in public places.
This forces you to do more talking and less touching. Sleepovers are a
no-no or sitting in the car together alone. You are only setting
yourselves up for a fall.
This might sound odd but don’t pray together behind
closed doors. I have found that praying together makes you feel close
and intimate and could actually lead you to other things you are trying
to avoid.
Renew your mind. Sexual purity starts from the mind.
What are you feeding your mind on, what books do you read, what TV or
Internet programs do you watch, what type of music do you listen to.
Feed your mind with the word of God, inspirational books, and edifying
materials. I am not saying watching movies is bad but it gets to a point
in your christian walk that you find some movies or music unedifying.
Take the relationship sloooooow… When things are
moving too fast like a car going out of control, pull the brakes! Ask
yourself why the rush, where are we rushing to? Be in control of your
relationship and not the relationship in control of you. Time has a way
of showing us what really matters. Remember Love is patience
Engaged couples are even more susceptible to
premarital sex. Don’t get engaged till there is a wedding date in
sight. Be more on your guard. Avoid tapping into the privileges of
marriage before marriage especially sexually. Quarter to marriage is not
the same as being married.
If you have fallen into sexual sin, there is still
hope for you. The key is not to stay defeated or think oh well, "I might
as well continue since I am in it already". No! Repent, ask God to
forgive you and restore you back to him. Staying sexually pure is
possible. Implement a plan to avoid falling into future temptation, as
they will come
God honours sexual purity. A lot of marriages are in
trouble today because of the seed of sexual immorality that was sown
premarital days. The cost of sexual impurity is very high and as a
child of God do what you must to avoid it.
Read on soulsistasblog.com and thought to share
Read on soulsistasblog.com and thought to share
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